The Vent Thread

[✠Kim✝]

I still don't get why I'm treated so differently.

I don't like it.
At all.

And stop leaving me out of everything! It's not fair.

[haley.]

really?
if you have something
anything!
to say to me

SAY IT. TO MY. FACE.

[haley.]

i'll never
ever
be good enough for you.

[✠Kim✝]

I'm sorry for the things I do.

You're so great and I just .. I don't deserve you. You're to good for me.

[dizz ✖]

_{...am i really that hard to remember?
i don't mean anything to you, do i?}

[/i][/center]

[__molii ★]

I fear that you'll replace me and leave me.

I shouldn't feel like that, because I know you wouldn't do that.

...or would you?

Fuck these feelings.

[✠Kim✝]

Excuse me kind ma'am,
I believe you've mistaken me for her.
So if you don't mind, I'll be going now.
It's not like you would notice I'm gone anyways.

[habu]

<sup>Well if I don't die
I'll just go crazy




and I still fucking hate incest so god damned much.</sup>

[haley.]

I know I'm not funny.
I know I'm not untalented, I know.

But I mean, come on. You know I think this way and feel this way. You know it makes me feel more worthless than I already am.

you know how terrified get.

[haley.]

OH. OK. I'LL JUST FUCKING SHARE FIRST PLACE. EVEN THOUGH I'VE BEEN HER LONGER. EVEN THOUGH I SHOULD MEAN SO MUCH FUCKING MORE. OK. YEAH. I'LL REMEMBER THAT. THAT'S OK.

NO, REALLY. GO PLAY. I'LL JUST SIT HERE. AND PRETEND YOU DON'T MEAN THE GODDAMN WORLD TO ME. IS IT BECAUSE I DIDN'T ACT OUT A CERTAIN FANTASY OF YOURS? REALLY? I MEAN, SERIOUSLY? OK. OK. THAT'S FINE.

YES, I'M FUCKING MAD.

[dizz ✖]

OH I'M SORRY, WOULD YOU LIKE SOME ICE FOR THAT BURN?

man up. fucking seriously. CAN'T YOU TAKE A GOD DAMN JOKE? I WASN'T TRYING TO BE MEAN.

xxx

I look at my art and want to cry.
Compare it to Molii's, Jaded's, Habu's, Haley's, Kraze's, Moon's, Kim's, EVERYONE'S. Ugh. Dammit. Dammit dammit dammit.

xxx

I HATE how I automatically assume everyone dislikes me.
I HATE being so neurotic.

^{I want to get to know Habu.}
BUT OF COURSE, I'M GONNA ASSUME SHE DOESN'T LIKE ME.

[haley.]

LOOK AT ME!!
Pay attention to me! Take hints! Stop acting like that towards them like they need you like I fucking need you!

I mean, do you not realize how I distance myself from others because of you? But you... I-If you keep this up, you'll end up like the others. BORED. GONE. And you don't say that now, but it's going to happen! It always fucking happens!

Why doesn't anyone...?

You are my everything. You are my best friend. I need you. But then you just... it's like you don't even reciprocate the feelings...! God, if you showed ANY of these signs, I would be all over you. I would do anything. I wouldn't even know what to do, I'd just pull shit out of my ass! But it's not like you need me, not like you want me. You have them. So whatever.

I'm so sick of feeling like I should numb myself.

I'm so sick of everyone getting all this love when I don't get any.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT, FUCK YOU, I DON'T CARE IF THAT'S SELFISH. IT'S FUCKING WHAT I WANT. I'D GIVE YOU ANYTHING YOU WANTED IN A HEARTBEAT. I WOULD STOP. EVERYTHING. ON A DIME. IF YOU WERE UPSET. AND HERE YOU ARE WITH FUCKING THOSE GUYS, AGAIN. WELL I'M SORRY, OK? I'M SORRY I'M NOT AS FUNNY, NOT AS TALENTED, NOT AS GOOD AS AN ARTIST OR NOT AS CUTE OR WHAT THE FUCK EVER, BUT I WILL ALWAYS BE THERE. EVERYONE ELSE SAYS THEY'LL BE THERE, BUT WHEN IT COMES DOWN TO IT, THEY'RE NOT, AND I ALWAYS WILL BE.

Trust Me.
It always goes like that.

my ears are ringing and i will never be able to tell my mother that i need it and good fucking god what is the matter with me?

[__molii ★]

GET IT THROUGH YOUR HEAD

I'M NOT REPLACING YOU WITH HER, FUCK
YOU'RE EVERYTHING I COULD ASK FOR

today's not gonna be a good day

[__molii ★]

face it, molii

you're annoying as shit

give up

and get a life

[haley.]

i don't know what i expect this therapy to do for me.
maybe make me less bitter.

cuz I'm really, really bitter.