The Vent Thread

[haley.]

so.

i want to make you mad.
i want to make you beg, but then i don't?
i want to seriously hurt you, but i want you safe and unharmed?
i want you to try, but when you try i get mad at you?

so.

when i do things that make you upset, you do them back. but it's weird of you do something that upsets me and i can't do it back?
when i read, i get furious, at everyone, but i keep reading?
when i coil into myself, i want you to rip me out, but if you try i bite your hand?

so.

i'm bringing this onto myself.
but i'm still mad at you for it?

[✠Kim✝]

i don't like this



i don't like this at all



^{it's killing me on the inside}

[/sup]

[__molii ★]

your attempt at making me jealous is successfull

i hope you're happy

paula. stop it. srsly.

[haley.]

AAAAAAAAAAAAA
I'M SICK OF HAVING TO SURVEY THE GODDAMN VENT THREAD TO MAKE SURE EVERYONE'S OK. I'M GOING TO RIP MY GODDAMN HAIR OUT. AND I'M SICK OF BEING CAREFUL NOT TO USE NAMES, WHEN EVERYONE KNOWS WHO THEY'RE ABOUT, ANYWAY.

DAMMIT, KIM I LOVE YOU SO SO SO SO FUCKING MUCH. BUT DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW BAD I AM AT TALKING TO YOU? I mean, I try, you just... you act like I'm bothering you. Or that you don't want to talk about what I try to talk about. And I'm sick of coming to you whining about how I don't know what to say Molii. I want to have conversations. I love you, Kim. Kimberly Rose Cueto, why don't you understand how we adore you? Do you have ANY idea how important you are to me? Yeah, I don't show it that much, because I figure that having Izzy makes you happy enough, But Jesus Christ Kim, you come on here venting and I go into this FRENZY where I'm like GOD, I did something to upset Kim. I DO WANT TO TALK TO YOU. I DON'T KNOW WHY WE DON'T HAVE CONVERSATIONS LIKE THE ONES I HAVE WITH JADE. Actually I do, it's because Jade is insane and she doesn't care if the conversation is all over the damn place, to an extent it isn't even a conversation by the time we're done BUT THE POINT IS, THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE WHO LOVE YOU A WHOLE FUCKING LOT. AND WE'RE NOT... IGNORING YOU. Do you have any idea what I would give to call you every single day just to hear your voice and make sure you're alright...?

And Isa, You know what you mean to me. You seriously are like my sister to me. A wonderful younger sister that I cannot wait to watch blossom out like the fire you are. But you are making a mistake that I made when I was younger. You are worrying far too much, you are over-thinking everything. You're thoughtful, you're funny, you're sweet. And you're so fucking smart it makes me jealous that I don't have more people like you in my schools, in my circle of friends. But don't let the little things get you down, Isa. Over-thinking all of this, trying to be the best you can - you don't NEED to try to be the best you can, because you're already amazing. You don't have to meet anyone's standards. Not at school, not online. You're amazing enough.

And Milly, please. I understand you love me, you understand I love you, so you must SEE what I feel by this point. I need you. DO YOU GET IT? I NEED YOU. I can't FIGHT with you. Do you have any idea how much - how HARD - I cried to Isa, to Ariel, about me not being able to deal with fighting with you. I couldn't do it. I CAN'T DO IT. With all these little things, you completely break my heart, but I need you so much I forgive you in a heartbeat. I can't go into chats with your friends because I get so... I don't even know how to explain it, Milly. I can't do it. It scares me. When you start going off with all these inside jokes with other people, I don't mind that. I really don't. But I read all your tweets, I see them interact, and sometimes they just IGNORE you. THAT breaks my heart. When we get into these little spats, we say our I love you's because that's... normal for me. Do you have any idea how much I freaked out when that little 'I'm starting to hate you' slipped? You don't even-- You said that when this stuff happens you start shaking, you get scared. I cry hard, I can't breathe, I have to find something to distract myself, busy myself, I can't think, I can't move, it's the scariest thing in the entire world. I don't know if it's really a panic-attack but... It's scary. And you say all these little things, that just... All I can do is type to you. But just a few pretty words don't make me feel better... I hate this. I don't even know what I'm saying. But, it's the vent thread, I just let my fingers move.
Hate it hate it hate it.

[haley.]

OOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
THAT'S WHY YOU KEEP HANGING AROUND HER
BECAUSE SHE'S INTO-- GOTCHA.

hey, guess what. :I that's like, TOTALLY NOT FUNNY, YOU KNOW?
I seriously think I'll just stop going to that website. A LITTLE ICON PISSES ME OFF WONDERS.

Fuck, I'm bitter.
You all suck.

[dizz ✖]

^{why do you do that...? it's pointless and makes you look stupid...
it doesn't make you look cool. it makes you look full of yourself. you act like everyone loves you when they probably don't.
you're fake. fake fake fake. you're a fake little liar.}

xxx

I need to stop over-thinking things. I need to stop worrying. I need to stop being so self-conscious.
I've been told this countless times by countless people, and I keep doing it. I hang on to others' words. And all I ask for is encouragement, encouragement, encouragement, 'cause I'm a needy bitch.
You lift me up, then you bring me back down.

xxx

<sup>i'm scared.
i've seen this happen before. the same exact scenario. and i try to be positive, i tell myself it won't happen but i never know...
and i'm scared...

so very, very scared...</sup>

[haley.]

hello world. I am hypocritical.

I would like this fandom so much more if you would just chill out and stop trying to obsess over it, stop trying to include it in everything you do. It totally doesn't help that you keep getting your new friends into it and THAT DOES NOT HELP WITH MY SELF-ESTEEM.
Like, could you please, pretty fucking please, just stop for a second and ask yourself, 'Gee, I wonder how Haley will feel if I do this?' PLEASE? DO I HAVE TO BEG, AGAIN?

I hate this pairing.
OK, I take that back. I don't hate it. BUT DAMN IF IT ISN'T AGGRAVATING. It's all OVER the goddamn place. And it doesn't help that you (and other people, ugh) keep kinda shoving it down my throat. Can't we take this slowly or something? Wouldn't that be so much simpler?

WHY IS EVERYTHING SO COMPLICATED HOLY FUCK
i am still bitter and all of you still suck.

[dizz ✖]

WOW.
i've known you since fucking second grade, irl, and you just... throw me away like that? forget me? ignore me? hate me?
yes, i have new friends, but SO DO YOU and i'm not ever gonna leave you... you mean so much and... fuck.
i'm sorry.

[haley.]

i thought they were close
i thought you wouldn't get too close to her because she already had that 'best friend'

i don't even know this girl. i'm trying so hard to become good friends with her, and she's so nice, but i probably hate her.

i don't know anything anymore.

x x x

NO, I REALLY DON'T LIKE YOU NOW
BACK THE FUCK OFF
judgmental... you don't lead someone on like that. And just because 'YOU GET TIRED' of someone, no matter how 'CREEPY' they are, that gives you NO RIGHT to snag someone else. NO. NO NO NO NO.


AND YOU
YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO POST THAT...

[dizz ✖]

I'm too scared to tell you what's wrong, because I know what will happen.
You'll lie to me. You'll lie, lie, lie, then think of an excuse so... I say everything's fine.
But it kinda is OK, because there are people who care about me, who don't lie to me. I'm important to some people.
I know one day you'll come running back to me. Say how you wish you had listened to me and how I was right all along. And you think I'll be waiting with open arms.
And you think I'll take you back, but I won't. It'll hurt, but I won't.

[✠Kim✝]

Where did my good personality go?
You know, the one that wasn't so serious.
The one that made people laugh and kept conversations going for hours.


xxx


"Hi Kelly!....Kelly?"
You ignored me.
I didn't get a "Happy Birthday, Kim!" I DIDN'T EVEN GET A LITTLE HELLO.
Instead you talk to Mia. You know, the one who made fun of you, called you a fat emo bitch. Said you were a liar who should drop dead.

I can't believe you're her friend again. I can't believe YOU INVITED HER TO YOUR BIRTHDAY PARTY.
Uhg.
Jerk.

xxx


:'|
That was a rumor.
I don't think anyone is going to come to your school and shoot you.
Just.. stop acting stupid.

[dizz ✖]

you know, there's a difference between encouraging me and lying to make me feel good.

xxx

^{i'll never be good enough for you...}

[dizz ✖]

you... you lied to me...
you always do this.

...are you mad or...?
just be patient, please.
i love you.
...i'm sorry.

[/center]

[haley.]

Wow, Dad.
You're such an asshole.

[habu]

OH COME ON

IT COULD HAVE BEEN A GREAT MOVIE

BUT FUCK YOU HOLLYWOOD, YOU MADE THE ENDING GAY

^{sorry I swear I am not homophobic HURNGSHGHS}